Every year is a year of growth, but 2019 is the year I’ve definitely flourished the most. From bad breakups to stressful work situations, I’ve experienced the lows. Luckily, there were highs, and those the highs encompassed what it means to bounce back and what that time of healing and enjoyment feels like.
Throughout the pain and discomfort, and even throughout the joy and laughter, I learned plenty about myself as well as general lessons we should all learn.
- Communication is everything
Cliche as it may be, it’s true.
As a public relations major, and as someone who skims through Cosmo articles on Snapchat here and there, this idea has been drilled into my head. And it’s so easy to tell friends and family who are struggling in their relationships, “Communication is key!” But I am finding out good communication has done wonders for my relationships.
Often in close relationships, people hide what they’re feeling and bottle it up. In the moment it seems like the right thing to do, but weeks or months later, it all comes out — and it’s not pretty.
I’m learning that if I really want or need space, all I have to do is say it. If I get upset by something the other person has said or not, I can just tell them. Being vulnerable is a scary thing but the outcome might surprise you with its relieving capabilities.
2. Always end on a positive note
I recently heard this from two friends, who heard it from their professor. When I thought about it, I relived the moments where instead of taking a step back to cool down, I let myself be petty and ended things poorly.
It’s called “end-point bias.” When you end things on bad terms, that’s what people will remember — the negative, the bad, and the ugly. But if you try to remain civil and end on a positive note, people are more likely to remember your efforts and feel positive thoughts toward you and the situation, even if the situation was a disaster.
3. Some things take time, so be patient
Whether it’s healing from a breakup or learning how to take things with a grain of salt — especially if you’re a sensitive soul like I am — understand that the good things do take time.
I used to let a lot of things get to me, and just that fact would bother me. Over time though, I’ve become not emotionless, but wiser and stronger, and now I know not to waste my energy on small things. I also react more maturely now, and this has come with time, growth, and even bad situations, which always show up when you least expect it (so just ~ride~ through it).
In the fast-paced environment that we live in, slow down and practice some patience with yourself. It’s worth a try.
– Haniya Shariff